im laying in bed listening to Ben Kweller, getting ready to do my evening meditation and then go to bed. dinner was average at best, but being my sweet self i said it was amazing and threw it all up later ;D kidding. i got home and Xavier was around which was nice, except he made mum give him a head massage before she gave me one, which was annoying. i got progressively angrier throughout this day as i decided to cut down on my cigarette intake. it fucking hard, i swear to god, but i intend to stay chilling at home until i have quit, and maybe then i can go around to becs again,, but i sincerely doubt it, she and dan are beginning to make me feel like and angry tard. i'll at least wait untli she calls me, that means her phone bill will have all been cleared. speaking of phone bills, i should pay mine.
and from the inside out,
you've changed you know you have,
dont make a good thing bad,
just let me hold you in my hands,
i'd do everything you want me to,
i do everything you want me to do.
i love ben kweller so much.
he's on par with ben stiller and that other ben whose last name has slipped my mind. i am so sick of everything. i feel like i've been trodden on and smacked in the head with a brick and i feel like i have done the same thing to everyone else. i think i believe in karma now.
the only problem really left is that all i can think about is two people, and they're the ones i miss the most. its about to make me cry. i hate it.
goodnight.
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